They spread fake news about him 24-7 for years trying to stop him but that didn’t work. Then they impeached him in Congress based off a kooky conspiracy theory but that didn’t work either. So they indicted him on some trumped up charges and convicted him in a kangaroo court but that didn’t work either and so then they resorted to their final plan trying to assassinate Donald Trump but fortunately that didn’t work and instead provided the world with some of the most iconic photos of all time showing Donald Trump surviving an assassination attempt and rising triumphantly.

But the liberal media didn’t want to admit what they themselves had incited and had been hoping for for years and so CNN’s initial report was that the Secret Service rushed Trump off the stage after he fell at a rally. There are a lot of screenshots floating around of the initial reports of the attempted assassination and it’s impossible to tell whether or not those are memes satirizing the media how they would downplay it and blame President Trump or whether they’re the actual headlines from the liberal media and being your trusted media analyst I double and triple check the facts and I can tell you that this is an actual headline and a real report from the cloud news network.

USA Today reported that Trump was removed from the stage by the Secret Service after loud noises startled the former president and the crowd. Of course, all the mainstream media had correspondents in attendance at the event, and anybody who was there or who saw the video of what happened knew instantly what went down. In fact, many in attendance were trying to alert the police and Secret Service that they saw a gunman on the roof just across the field before he started shooting.

“On the roof! He’s got a gun!” That was before he fired the first shot. The Secret Service responded, of course. There are a lot of questions about how this could possibly happen. How could the Secret Service not secure the roof of a building just a few hundred feet away in direct line of sight of President Trump on the stage? How could they not have noticed the gunman climbing up there and getting into position? How could they not quickly alert the Secret Service and pull President Trump off the stage as soon as multiple people started reporting and screaming that there was a gunman that they saw on the roof right next door?

Understandably, a lot of people think there was some kind of conspiracy involved here, either looking the other way and allowing it to happen or having a hand in it somehow. But there might actually be a much simpler explanation. Instead of a conspiracy, it looks like it was diversity to expand hiring. They’re aiming to have 30 women recruits by 2030 and even allowed YouTube influencer Michelle Khare to train with agents.

“I’m very conscious,” says the head of the Secret Service, by the way, “as I sit in this chair now, of making sure that we need to attract diverse candidates and ensure that we are developing and giving opportunities to everybody in our workforce, particularly women.” Obviously, it doesn’t take a genius to see how this policy was going to turn out. Take a look at these three stooges, just bumbling idiots getting in the way of the actual Secret Service.

“We need more diversity in the Secret Service,” they said. This one doesn’t even hold a gun. “We need more women in the Secret Service,” they said. Diversity is obviously our strength. This seems like a Saturday Night Live skit if Saturday Night Live was still funny. Of course, these women won’t be fired. The only reason this happened, they’ll say, is because they didn’t initiate their diversity agenda enough. They implemented too little diversity.

Everyone with a brain knew that this was likely coming, and certainly no surprise because the liberal media and the Marxist Democrats have been trying to incite a lunatic into doing this for many years now. But when you point that out, then you get called the conspiracy theorist, like Tucker Carlson did, who they said stoked conspiracy theories when he pointed out the obvious. And instead of being mad at themselves, at their industry, at their political pundits, at the Democrat party for spewing the most vile and toxic rhetoric ever seen on planet Earth equating Donald Trump with Hitler, with a dictator who’s going to destroy America and needs to be stopped by any means necessary, they, of course, are mad at Donald Trump.

I do want to say there was one thing that when I watched the tape I found odd because of all the heated rhetoric, and that is that the liberal media didn’t apologize for inciting this attack. After he was hit, former President Trump got up and said, “Fight, fight, fight.” I think what we’re hearing from people is that’s not the message that we want to be sending right now. We want to tamp it down. Yes, it’s Donald Trump who needs to tamp down the rhetoric because his funny nicknames for his opponents just hurt too many people’s feelings, not mainstream media outlets like the Washington Post which says, “Yes, it’s okay to compare Trump to Hitler,” or old Joe says, “Donald Trump is a genuine threat to this nation. He’s a threat to our freedom. He’s a threat to our democracy. He’s literally a threat to everything that America stands for.”

It certainly is insane and unhinged political ranting from the Democrats, which they’re using as information warfare, again hoping to incite just this kind of event. Lunatic rantings like this: “I just don’t even know why there aren’t uprisings all over the country. Maybe there will be.” “People need to start taking to the streets. This is a dictator.” “You know, there needs to be unrest in the streets for as long as there’s unrest in our lives.” “Enemies of the state.” “Show me where it says that protests are supposed to be polite and peaceful.” “They go low, we kick them.” “How do you resist the temptation to run up and wring her neck?” “The biggest terror threat in this country is white men, most of them radicalized right off to the right.” “I thought he should have punched him in the face. Even if you lost, he insulted your wife on the escalator and called Mexicans rapists and murderers.” “He said, ‘Well, what do you think I should have done?’ So I think you should have punched him in the face and then gotten out of the race. You would have been a hero.” “I’d like to punch him in the face.” “I said if we were in high school, I’d take you behind the gym and beat the hell out of him.” “Punch some people in the face.” “When was the last time an actor assassinated a president?” “They’re still gonna have to go out and put a bullet in Donald Trump, and that’s a fact.”

Here’s the supposed president of the United States, Joe Biden, two hours after the attempted assassination, still not having any idea what the hell happened, even though his handlers put him out for a statement in front of the nation. “I don’t know enough to—I have—I have an opinion, but I don’t have any facts. So I want to make sure we have all the facts before I make any more comments. Thank you.”

We had enough facts to determine what happened within five seconds, but they couldn’t come to grips for a few hours and finally admitted themselves what it was that they caused. Others, however, quickly took to TikTok to express their disappointment that the attempted assassination was unsuccessful, like this lunatic: “You’re telling me somebody finally had the balls to bring a pew-pew?” “A pew-pew,” she said, because the kids on TikTok substitute words so that their videos don’t get flagged and taken down for inciting violence. So obviously she’s talking about a gun, “and he missed? We were a second away. We were a centimeter away from half of the problem being gone, and you missed.”

There are plenty more videos just like this, but I’ll spare you any more cringe. And miraculously, some of the meme makers were able to bring light to the situation, coming up with gems like this: “Someone shot my vice president,” and this one: “Joe, we missed.” And this, which perhaps is the best: “Trump versus a bullet, Biden versus stairs.” And this is the first video of Donald Trump after being released from the hospital, exiting his jet presumably back in Florida at Mar-a-Lago. Obviously after having received some stitches on his ear, but other than that, thank God, unscathed.

We’re not in Kansas anymore. We’re not in America anymore. We’re in a banana republic, a third-world country. There is a good chance that if Donald Trump wins, we could maybe restore some semblance of normalcy, but as I’ve been saying, these next four months are going to be a bumpy road, so you better buckle up.

See more of Mark Dice on their Public Channel and the MPN Mark Dice channel.